When faced with their parent’s divorcing most children feel a frightening lack of control.  Of course they need lots of reassurance about how this was a grown-up decision having nothing to do with how much both parents love them.

One good idea is to find ways in which children can exert a bit of control over the situation.  Listening to their feelings and honoring them with your attention is invaluable in this regard.  It is also possible to give children some control over their surroundings.  Allowing them to choose familiar things, such as toys, colors, books and favorite stuffed animals to live at each parents’ house can be very comforting.  

Pictured here is a Murphy bed that could quickly convert a home office space to a child’s special bedroom.  This solution honors a space need for both parent and child.

Tip:  Remember that in order to feel special the Murphy bed should always be opened and personalized before your child arrives–each time! And, don’t forget Teddy during the move between parental homes.  Children need something of their own to hold onto during this time of transition.